When someone you care about loses a person they love, sending flowers is one of the oldest ways to say you are thinking of them.
It can also feel confusing, because there are unwritten rules about who sends what, where it goes and when it should arrive.
This guide walks through the common customs, so you can choose something that feels right and arrives where it is wanted.
Almost any tasteful arrangement is welcome at a funeral or memorial service.
Larger pieces, like casket sprays, standing sprays and wreaths, are made to be displayed at the service.
Smaller arrangements, sympathy plants and baskets are easier for the family to take home and keep.
Soft whites, creams and pastels are the most traditional colors, but a favorite color of the person who died is always a thoughtful choice.
If you are unsure, a simple arrangement with a sincere card is never wrong.
Immediate family.
The spouse, children, parents or siblings usually choose the casket spray, or an urn arrangement if the service follows a cremation.
Because there is normally only one of each, the family often decides together who will order it.
Extended family and close friends.
Grandchildren, cousins and close friends often send a standing spray, a wreath or a large arrangement for the service.
Some send a plant or flowers to the family’s home instead, especially if they live far away.
Coworkers, clubs and church groups.
Groups usually pool together for one standing spray or a plant, with the group’s name on the card.
This keeps things simple for the family and makes it easy for them to see who was thinking of them.
Neighbors and acquaintances.
A plant or sympathy flowers for the home are a kind, low-key way to show you care.
Flowers for the service should arrive before the visitation or the funeral begins, so the staff have time to set them in place.
Check the obituary or call the funeral home for the date and start time.
At checkout, pick a delivery date that falls before the service, and add the service time in the special delivery instructions box.
Delivery is available Monday through Saturday, and Sunday delivery is not offered.
The same day cut-off time is listed under Customer Service in the store menu.
If you hear the news after the funeral, it is not too late.
Flowers or a plant sent to the home a week or a few weeks later often mean a great deal, because that is when the visits and calls slow down.
Send display pieces, like standing sprays, wreaths and casket sprays, to the funeral home, church or chapel where the service will be held.
Enter the name of the venue in the Institution field at checkout, along with its street address.
Send smaller arrangements and plants to the family’s home if you want them to have something to keep.
Before you send to a house, think about whether someone will be there to receive it, since families often travel or stay elsewhere around a funeral.
When in doubt, the funeral home is a safe choice, and staff will usually help the family take flowers home after the service.
Traditions vary between families, even within the same faith, so the most reliable step is to read the obituary or ask the funeral home.
With that in mind, here are some general patterns.
Flowers are common and welcome at most Christian funerals, including Catholic and Protestant services.
In Jewish tradition, flowers are not customary at the funeral, and many families prefer a donation or food sent to the home during shiva.
In Muslim communities, customs vary, and some families prefer simple arrangements or no flowers, so it is best to ask first.
At Hindu and Buddhist services, white flowers are often associated with mourning, and some families prefer arrangements sent to the home.
In many East Asian families, white and yellow flowers are traditional for mourning, and bright red arrangements are usually avoided.
If you are not sure, a plant or a simple white arrangement sent to the home is a respectful choice in most situations.
Many obituaries include a line such as “in lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to” a charity that mattered to the person.
When you see that request, the kindest response is to honor it and make the donation.
If you are close to the family and want to send something personal as well, a small plant or arrangement sent to the home a little later is usually welcome.
Avoid sending a large display piece to the service when the family has asked for donations, since it can feel like the request was missed.
Sign the card with your full name, or your family or group name, so the family knows who sent it.
Keep the card message short and sincere.
Our guide on what to write on a sympathy card has examples for friends, coworkers and family.
If you sent flowers, there is no need to follow up about them.
The family may send thank-you notes later, but many are overwhelmed, so a note is a kindness, not an obligation.
Is it rude to send flowers if the family asked for donations?
It is better to honor the request and donate.
If you are close to the family, a small plant or arrangement sent to the home later is usually still welcome.
Can I send flowers if I cannot attend the funeral?
Yes.
Sending flowers is a common way to show support when you cannot be there.
A card with your name lets the family know you were thinking of them.
How much should I spend on funeral flowers?
There is no set amount.
Choose what feels right for your relationship and budget, and you will see the full price, service charge and tax in your cart before you pay.
What colors are best for funeral flowers?
White, cream and soft pastels are the most traditional.
A favorite color of the person who died is also a thoughtful choice, unless the family’s tradition suggests otherwise.
Should coworkers send flowers together?
Often, yes.
One standing spray or plant from the whole team is simpler for the family than several small pieces, and the card can list the team’s name.
When you are ready, browse the arrangements above, or start with our standing sprays for the service.